Sunday, July 19
Pregnancy and Confusion
I know many people probably experience the same types of things when going through their first trimester. I figured I might as well document my own for later reminiscing, maybe for a baby book or something down the road?
I am now officially done with my first trimester, and very happy to announce I am not experiencing any more morning sickness type symptoms anymore! Sometimes it sneaks up on me when I'm hungry, but only then. I would say my first trimester was probably pretty mild. I didn't throw up, and as long as I was eating, I was feeling OK. For me, this first trimester was very very confusion and frustrating.
The 6 months before I got pregnant, I was getting into the whole fitness thing. T got me a membership to a local gym for Christmas, and I was using it 3 or 4 times a week. We were monitoring our eating habits, and cutting back on a lot of calories. We got rid of those late night meals, and we even stopped drinking soda altogether (if you know T, you know it is quite a feat to get him to stop drinking Mountain Dew). I drank a gallon of water a day, and it helped a lot with feeling hungry.
Of course we lost weight, which was great, but the most significant change for me was a greater understanding of my body. I was feeling in-tune with it. I knew if I was feeling hungry right after I ate, either I was thirsty or needed to wait until the food was digested more to feel full. I knew if I had a headache, it was because I hadn't drank enough water that day. I was really starting to feel like my body and I were, for once, on the same page.
Then, I got pregnant, and everything changed. Nothing felt right, nothing made me feel better sometimes. My doctor said this was normal, which is good to hear, but I would still get so annoyed with my body. I couldn't tell what was wrong with me. Am I thirsty? Am I tired? Am I hungry? Do I have to go to the bathroom? I can't tell! Even when I tried all those things, it still didn't make me feel better. Unfortunately, I took a lot of my frustrations out on T, which made him frustrated, too.
"What can I do to make you feel better?," He would ask.
"I don't know!" I would say (OK, yell).
The most frustrating part for me was that it felt like this gift of being at one with my own body was snatched away from me in a spilt second. I didn't even have time to adjust to this new feeling of confusion within myself.
Fortunately, these feelings have subsided, and I am starting to feel like my old self again. I hear the second trimester is the 'easy trimester', so I'm hoping it will be! What a strange and befuddling trip it's been so far!
I am getting more excited to meet this little person growing inside me. It's obvious my family feels the same way. This is the first grandchild and great-grandchild on my side, and my mom cannot contain her excitement. A few weeks ago she took me maternity clothes shopping, and she told all the sales people she was going to be a grandma.
I'm glad my mom acts the way she does because it makes me feel more excited and less nervous about this whole experience...